Gender is Fucking Confusing – Rant

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June 5, 2015 by jayce428

Gender is a confusing subject because as I continue to explore my gender and sexuality I’m figuring out it’s not all cut and dry as I was taught to believe. There has only been one fact that has been a constant though: I am attracted to masculine individuals – more specifically people who are transgender or cis-gendered men. 

I noticed that I’ve kind of, not really, moved away from the term FTM but I still have body dysphoria. Although I don’t want to take hormones and want to have a mastectomy. Though I’m still figuring it out I’m currently using the pronouns “they/them” and as genderqueer FTM. It’s a lot of information in one post – I know, really I know it’s just something that is important to my journey as a sub.

But as a sub it’s something that I am able to understand so I can elaborate to others clearly. I know that talking about non-binary people has become somewhat a joke, but it’s very frustrating and just depressing to even have to find others who are the same. Especially when I don’t have the words to describe it, and people keep saying I’m a ‘special snowflake’ which pisses me off even more.

Also, I am very happy to have found a group on Fetlife for LGBT people, which has been a godsend and I would totally recommend joining if you are LGBT or if you just want to. https://fetlife.com/groups/1917

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