What’s the deal with this anonymity stuff?


November 17, 2014 by jayce428


Anonymity is quite important to some of those (like me) who has lots to lose if certain people find out about our involvement in the BDSM community. Literately, if I was found out by grandparents I would be kicked out and homeless.

I know it’s not just me. I have a job but I don’t make enough to pay a house bill and so I live with family. For those wondering, I clean my own laundry and help out all the time. But unfortunately with the views my grandfather has I would probably kicked out flat on my ass if someone found out, and I’m not sure if what I would do then.

So just a sneak little peek into my own life, and just trying to express anonymity is important for some people – if you see someone from a munch don’t just talk about BDSM right in front of their friends and family. From just identifying someone as part of the BDSM community can end relationships, cause family feuds, and tarnish their reputation in their communities, and children can be taken from their homes.

Obviously there is much more to lose, their self-respect, self-confidence, and become depressed by the reaction of the public to their association to the BDSM community.

So unless someone relinquishes this information willingly in public, you have no right to do so for them, and should be ashamed if you do so. I know that the public shouldn’t have this sort of reaction but it’s the current condition – defacing someone in public is a crime and should be treated as such.



3 thoughts on “What’s the deal with this anonymity stuff?

  1. FervidM says:

    You have raise an excellent point. Unfortunately, there is a certain “stigma” associated with the community. I could never openly discuss this in my current profession or with members of family. I relate the lifestyle to wearing deviously sexy lingerie under our business clothes – No one would know unless you decided to give them a slight peek. We could hope for a more open-minded general populace; but, I fear that won’t happen in our lifetimes.


    • jayce428 says:

      Yes it’s quite unfortunate, for someone such as myself if someone in my workplace would find out it would undoubtedly spread like wildfire. For small towns (population 2810) like mine no one is safe from rumors, by lunchtime almost everyone would know, and their would be a huge chance my boss would find a reason to fire me: because for me if I had the ability to wear a collar to work without someone making a big deal of it I would. I do wear small things to work like bracelets that aren’t terribly noticeable, but when I wear my gay pride bracelet gets a lot of flack (people don’t understand that they don’t exactly have to talk to be heard facial expressions is enough). But if people at least tolerated it, the world might be a better place. I’m not too keen on being liked by customers anyway, mainly because I don’t associate myself with them outside of work.


      • FervidM says:

        It’s such a shame how closed minded people are. Truly the beauty that is found in other people’s experiences outside of oneself is like a never ending novel. These people shove their noses in books, but don’t take the time to get to now people who may be living that reality. Why do people feel so threatened by acceptance. Acceptance does not mean you agree with the practice; but, what harm is there in merely accepting, learning, and encouraging each person’s path to fulfillment and happiness. It’s sickens me, honestly.


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